R.I.P. Santa

January 4, 2012

“Mom, is Santa REAL?” ….. “Mom, is there really a Santa or are YOU Santa?” …. “Mom, how could Santa possibly make it to all the good boys and girls in one night? The world’s a big place you know!” …. “Mom, if there really IS a Santa then I will get an iPad for Christmas, right?”

It was about three weeks before Christmas and the non-stop questions and the relentless grilling from the little people in this house had started to wear on me.  November and December were crazy busy and with the stress of work and trying to keep up with church events and school Christmas programs I was feeling tired and overwhelmed.  I had so much Christmas shopping to finish and hadn’t a clue when I would do it … let alone when I would find the time to wrap all the presents.  All evening Ethan had been bombarding me with questions about Santa and I had done a pretty good job of giving vague answers or ignoring the questions. 

But the kid is good … like a mini Magnum PI … and I finally cracked.

“Mom, is Santa REAL?”

“What do you want Santa to bring you for Christmas?”

“An iPad or a 3DS ….. but is there really a Santa or are YOU Santa?”

“What do you think Rudolph and Santa are doing right now? I bet they are busy getting everything ready for the big night!”

“Mom …. I was thinking about this whole Santa thing and how could Santa possibly make it to all the good boys and girls in one night? The world’s a big place you know!”

“Yes, the world is a big place.”

“Mom, if there really IS a Santa then I will get an iPad for Christmas, right?”

That was the question that pushed me over the edge …..  I looked at Ethan and realized this kid was not giving up!

 “Do you really want to know if Santa is real?”


“Are you sure?”

He nodded his head.

I looked him straight in the eye and broke the news, “Santa is not real … It’s just Dad and I.”

Instead of heartbreak Ethan seemed elated, “Yes!  I knew it!”  he exclaimed, grinning ear to ear.

I went back to folding laundry thinking that the questions would stop, but Ethan had to get the whole story.

“Wait a minute …. So you MAKE the cookies and then you EAT the cookies?”

I laughed and said, “Well … yes, but Dad helps!”

“Well, if Santa is not real then I guess I don’t have to be good. I mean, I’m not going to get coal in my stocking if Santa is not real!”

“Are you sure you want to test that theory?”

“Hmmm …. Maybe I’ll just keep being good. It’s not that long until Christmas and I think I can stay out of trouble for a few more weeks.”

As we were getting ready for bed Ethan decided to break the news to Emma.

“Hey Emma – did you know that Santa is not real?  It’s just Mom and Dad.”

“Wait … what? What do you mean?”

“There is no Santa. You know the cookies we leave out for Santa? Mom and Dad just eat those and then they put the presents under the tree.”

Emma’s mouth dropped open. She was shocked! “I really believed it! I believed there was a Santa … and reindeer ….and that they could fly! I believed that Santa had a workshop up at the North Pole … and that he made all the toys … and that he had elves!  I believed the whole thing!”

She thought a little more and said, “So it’s just you and Dad?” 

I nodded, “Yes, just me and Dad.” 

“Well, that’s kinda boring … not nearly as exciting as reindeer and flying and a sleigh filled with toys. Maybe we can still pretend there is a Santa … I mean, we will know it’s REALLY you guys, but we can pretend and still write letters and make cookies. Do you think we can do that?”

“Sure, I think we can do that. It would be fun to keep pretending, wouldn’t it?”

They both agreed and then Ethan added, “I bet you are glad we are going to keep playing your game because otherwise you wouldn’t get to eat all those cookies on Christmas Eve!”

While eating dinner one night we started talking about dreams.

Emma started telling us about her dream (or maybe more accurately “nightmare”) that she had the night before. 

This dream involves food (as most of Emma’s dreams do) and I’m pretty sure is the result of too much sugar before bed ….

So this is how the dream went (as told to me by Emma). 


(Images below were created by Emma with a little help from Mom)

There was this giant river of lava filled with cookies.

They were GIANT metal cookies. 

Well, the cookies weren’t metal, but there was metal on the bottom of the cookies to keep the lava from making the cookies soggy. 

I was jumping from cookie to cookie like this (she showed me how she was jumping or hopping from one cookie to the next).

One of the cookies was really far apart so I had to jump like I was doing the long jump (again she gave me a visual interpretation of the jump). 

I had to be careful not to fall in the hot lava!

I was going faster and faster because I was being chased by an evil donut! 

You know, donuts are my worst enemy! 

He was a mean donut and he was chasing me as I jumped across the lava on the cookies. 

I was so scared … he was getting closer and closer.

But then, my hero showed up!

Grandpa came and he scooped me up and saved me from the evil donut and took me back to his house.

We ate cookies together. 

I was so glad to be safe that I ate all the cookies that Grandpa had and drank all his milk too!

He didn’t care though, he was just happy I was safe and snuggled up on his lap.